melangedmess:

babygirl I can feel guilty in ways you can’t even imagine

teaboot:

creativemercinary:

teaboot:

An enemy is just a friend I haven’t worn down

Are you saying that you’re the main character of a kids cartoon?

I’m saying that “I’m going to be friends with you” is both a promise and a threat

thesituation:

skysybil:

thesituation:

weed strain called they hit the pentagon

you just gotta call it “the pentagon” so you can hit it yourself

let’s be business partners

supermary64:

supermary64:

I love how muppets walk I wish I could walk like that

antifas:

walkietalkiesaki:

antifas:

antifas:

interesting fact i have titanium in my spine

Fun Fact!

Titanium not only is crazy durable, but it noo magnet! Thas wy Dock chok jjiun spi; surgyr ad pater noster, qui es in cœlis; sanctificetur nomen tuum: Adveniat regnum tuum; fiat voluntas tua, sicut in cœlo, et in terra. Panem nostrum cotidianum da nobis hodie: Et dimitte nobis debita nostra, sicut et nos dimittimus debitoribus nostris: et ne nos inducas in tentationem: sed libera nos a malo.

dude got hit with the ol’ Lorum Ipsem beam😞

queenwaker:

thepoisonroom:

loudly going “YOU’RE GOOD YOU’RE GOOD” to myself to ward off the memory of every embarrassing thing i’ve ever done

misswebsite:

thrift store resellers are like if landlords were egirls

rooftopvoter:

rooftopvoter:

bugstomp:

DJ Joint Custody turning up every other weekend